Showing posts with label spiritual bypass. Show all posts
Showing posts with label spiritual bypass. Show all posts

Monday, April 28, 2014

Spiritual Bypassing - from Teal Swan

 

"Spiritual Bypassing is the cancer of the spiritual world." Yes, yes it is. This is a nice, brief look at the topic from Teal (Tea Time with Teal) - The Spiritual Catalyst.

The best book on the subject, destined to become a classic text for spiritual seekers, is Robert Augustus Masters' Spiritual Bypassing: When Spirituality Disconnects Us from What Really Matters (2010).

Spiritual Bypassing

Published on Apr 26, 2014


Spiritual bypassing (or whitewashing) is the act of using spiritual beliefs to avoid facing or healing one's painful feelings, unresolved wounds and unmet needs. It is a state of avoidance. Because it is a state of avoidance, it is a state of resistance. I personally, consider Spiritual bypassing to be the shadow side of spirituality.

The spiritual beliefs of any spiritual tradition, be it Christian, Hindu, Buddhist, New Age, Islamic, or even Self Help, can provide ample justification for living in a state of inauthenticity. They can all provide justification for avoiding the unwanted aspects of one's own feelings and state of being in favor of what is considered to be "a more enlightened state". In this episode, Teal Swan gives examples of spiritual bypassing and suggests ways that we can avoid doing it.

Subscribe to Weekly Podcast of Tea Time With Teal 
Ask Teal Website - http://www.askteal.com
Kuan Yin's Mantra (c) 2002 Lisa Thiel - used by permission http://www.sacreddream.com

Wednesday, October 02, 2013

New Issue of Integral Review - Vol. 9(3), Sept 2013 - Abstracts

A new issue of Integral Review, Vol. 9(3), September 2013 is now online and available to read. As always, it is an open access, Creative Commons publication.

Here are the abstracts. I am particularly interested in the articles by Gary Raucher (initiation in Western esoteric thought) and Bahman A.K. Shirazi (metaphysics and spiritual bypassing in integral psychology).
Enjoy!

Special Issue: CIIS - Integral consciousness: From cosmology to ecology

CIIS Special Issue Editor: Bahman Shiraz

Vol. 9, No. 3 Abstracts 

 

Editorial

Bahman Shiraz

The Founding Mission of CIIS as an Education for the Whole Person

Joseph L. Subbiondo

Abstract: This article discusses the introduction of meditation practice into higher education as part of an integral approach to education. A number of current authors are cited emphasizing the importance and relevance of mindfulness mediation in daily life. In addition, California Institute of Integral Studies founder Haridas Chaudhuri’s philosophy of meditation and its connection to action are explored.

* * * * *

The Quest for Integral Ecology

Sam Mickey, Adam Robbert, Laura Reddick

Abstract: Integral ecology is an emerging paradigm in ecological theory and practice, with multiple and varied integral approaches to ecology having been proposed in recent decades. A common aim of integral ecologies is to cross boundaries between disciplines (humanities, social sciences, and biophysical sciences) in efforts to develop comprehensive understandings of and responses to the intertwining of nature, culture, and consciousness in ecological issues. This article presents an exploration of the different approaches that have been taken in articulating an integral ecology. Along with a historical overview of the notion of integral ecology, we present an exposition of some of the philosophical and religious visions that are shared by the diversity of integral ecologies. Keywords: ecology, integral ecology, religion and ecology, speculative philosophy, Thomas Berry.

* * * * *

Toward an Integral Ecopsychology: In Service of Earth, Psyche, and Spirit

Adrian Villasenor-Galarza

Abstract: In this paper, I advance a proposal for an integral ecopsychology, defining it as the study of the multileveled connection between humans and Earth. The initial section expounds the critical moment we as a species find ourselves at and, touching on different ecological schools, focuses on ecopsychology as a less divisive lens from which to assess our planetary moment. In the next section, I explore three avenues in which the project of ecopsychology enters into dialogue with spiritual and religious wisdom, thus expanding the project’s scope while spelling out the particular lineage of integral philosophy followed. The next section addresses the value of integral ecopsychology in facing the ecological crisis, highlighting the importance of seeing such a crisis as a crisis of human consciousness. At the level of consciousness, religious and spiritual wisdom have much to offer, in particular the anthropocosmic or “cosmic human” perspective introduced in the next section. The relevance of the anthropocosmic perspective to cultivate ecologically sound behaviors and ecopsychological health is explored and presented as a main means to bringing ecopsychology in direct contact with religious and spiritual teachings. This contact is necessary for the study of the multileveled connection between humans and Earth. Finally, I propose an expanded definition of integral ecopsychology while offering three tenets deemed essential for its advancement.

* * * * *

Integral Ecofeminism: An Introduction

Chandra Alexandre

Abstract: This article offers an introduction to integral ecofeminism as a spiritually-grounded philosophy and movement seeking to catalyze, transform and nurture the rising tension of the entire planet. It articulates integral ecofeminism as an un-pathologizing force toward healing, as the offering of a possibility for creating and sustaining the emergent growth of individuals, institutions and our world systems toward awareness. Doing so, it embraces sacred and secular, rational and emotional, vibrant and still, in its conception of reality; and with this, it is a way of looking at the world whole, seeking to acknowledge the wisdom of creation in its multiplicity, specificity, and completely profound manifestation.

* * * * *

Loving Water: In Service of a New WaterEthic

Elizabeth McAnally

Abstract: In this paper, I argue that a new water ethic is needed in light of the global water crisis, an ethic that responds to contemporary water issues as it draws from the values embedded within the rich religious and spiritual traditions of the world. This paper explores how a new water ethic could gain much from the Hindu concept seva (loving service) that arises from the traditions of bhakti yoga (loving devotion) and karma yoga (altruistic service). Drawing from David Haberman’s work with the Yamuna River of Northern India, I investigate how the concept of seva has been recently used in the context of environmental activism that promotes restoration efforts of the Yamuna River, a river worshiped by many as a goddess of love.

* * * * *

An Integral Perspective on Current Economic Challenges: Making Sense of Market Crashes 

Pravir Malik

Abstract: Market crises are interpreted in much the same way. Hence action is also always of a similar type, regardless of the market crisis that may have occurred. It is a similar set of tools that are applied to all crises, and usually this has to do with managing the money supply, interest rates, and slapping on austerity measures. But this is a myopic view. Crises are never the same. Presented here is a holistic model that draws inspiration form the journey a seed makes in becoming a flower in more fully understanding the nature of the crisis we may be facing. Action will be different depending on what phase in the journey the economy is assessed at being. In this paper we look at market crises scanning four decades, from the Bear Market of the early 1970s to recent European Union Sovereign Debt Crises.

* * * * *

The Path of Initiation: The Integration of Psychological and Spiritual Development in Western Esoteric Thought

Gary Raucher

Abstract: This paper examines, from an emic stance, a strand of Western esoteric wisdom that offers a particular perspective on psycho-spiritual development in relation to spiritual emergence, the mutually interdependent evolution of consciousness and substance, and the functional role of human incarnation within our planetary life. The writings of Alice A. Bailey (1880-1949) and Lucille Cedercrans (1921-1984) serve as significant reference points in this effort. These teachings hold an integral view of human development in which a person’s awareness and self-identification progress from polarization in physical matter and sensation through progressively subtler gradients of emotional and mental experience, culminating in “The Path of Initiation,” a phase of psychological and spiritual expansions into deepening levels of transcendent, supramental consciousness and functioning. The esoteric teachings described here portray this path descriptively rather than prescriptively, and have significant parallels to Sri Aurobindo’s Integral vision. Both consider human life in form to be a vital and necessary phase within the larger cosmic evolution of consciousness and matter, and both are frameworks that expansively embrace the significance of the Divine as both immanent and transcendent presence. The important issue of epistemological methodology and the testing of esoteric assertions is also considered.

* * * * *

A New Creation on Earth: Death and Transformation in the Yoga of Mother Mirra Alfassa

Stephen Lerner Julich

Abstract: This paper acts as a précis of the author’s dissertation in East-West Psychology at the California Institute of Integral Studies in San Francisco. The dissertation, entitled Death and Transformation in the Yoga of Mirra Alfassa (1878-1973), Mother of the Sri Aurobindo Ashram: A Jungian Hermeneutic, is a cross-cultural exploration and analysis of symbols of death and transformation found in Mother’s conversations and writings, undertaken as a Jungian amplification. Focused mainly on her discussions of the psychic being and death, it is argued that the Mother remained rooted in her original Western Occult training, and can best be understood if this training, under the guidance of Western Kabbalist and Hermeticist Max Théon, is seen, not as of merely passing interest, but as integral to her development.

* * * * *

Traditional Roots of Sri Aurobindo’s Integral Yoga

Debashish Banerji

Abstract: Sri Aurobindo’s teachings on Integral Yoga are couched in a universal and impersonal language, and could be considered an early input to contemporary transpersonal psychology. Yet, while he was writing his principal works in English, he was also keeping a diary of his experiences and understandings in a personal patois that hybridized English and Sanskrit. A hermeneutic perusal of this text, The Record of Yoga, published by the Sri Aurobindo Ashram, uncovers the semiotics of Indian yoga traditions, showing how Sri Aurobindo utilizes and furthers their discourse, and where he introduces new elements which may be considered “modern.” This essay takes a psycho-biographical approach to the life of Sri Aurobindo (1872-1950), tracing his encounters with texts and situated traditions of Indian yoga from the period of his return to India from England (1893) till his settlement in Pondicherry (1910), to excavate the traditional roots and modern ruptures of his own yoga practice, which goes to inform his non-sectarian yoga teachings.

* * * * *

The Metaphysical Instincts & Spiritual Bypassing in Integral Psychology

Bahman A.K. Shirazi

Abstract: Instincts are innate, unconscious means by which Nature operates in all forms of life including animals and human beings. In humans however, with progressive evolution of consciousness, instincts become increasingly conscious and regulated by egoic functions. Biological instincts associated with the lower-unconscious such as survival, aggressive, and reproductive instincts are well known in general psychology. The higher-unconscious, which is unique to human beings, may be said to have its own instinctual processes referred to here as the ‘metaphysical instincts’. In traditional spiritual practices awakening the metaphysical instincts has often been done at the expense of suppressing the biological instincts—a process referred to as spiritual bypassing. This essay discusses how the metaphysical instincts initially expressed as the religious impulse with associated beliefs and behaviors may be transformed and made fully conscious, and integrated with the biological instincts in integral yoga and psychology in order to achieve wholeness of personality.

Wednesday, July 18, 2012

Spiritual Bypassing ~ Dialogue with Robert Augustus Masters and John Dupuy


This talk was brought to my attention by Arthur Gillard, a friend on Google + and other virtual locations. Masters and Dupuy are both psychotherapists and they are both integrally oriented, but their versions differ from the mainstream Wilberian integral crowd, so it's an interesting dialogue.

I reviewed Masters' Spiritual Bypassing when it came out. Click the image above to get the book at Amazon, or click this link - I highly recommend the book.

In the interest of full clarity, this dialogue is posted on the Profound Meditation Program site, a program designed to compete with Bill Harris's Holosync stuff. I don't know anything about these programs, and I don't go that route anyway. For me, mindfulness and simply trying to be "present" in my life are my meditation practices.

Spiritual Bypassing ~ Dialogue with Robert Augustus Masters and John Dupuy

In this dialog we discuss Robert Augustus Master's book, Spiritual Bypassing, and the idea that one must embrace the darkness and the suffering in order to transform and if one doesn't it causes manifold pathologies…this has been a key in developing Integral Recovery, as well as in my own personal healing and transformation. We also get very personal and talk about our prospective lives and experiences, as well as addressing some of the elephants in the halls of the Integral world. I hope you find it as helpful and compelling as I did. Robert also shares his first experience with PMP!

------------------------

At a recent Enneagram workshop with Helen Palmer and Leslie Hershberger, I heard the book, Spirital Bypassing, by Robert Augustus Masters, referenced several times and the intuitive voice said "get it." I had been aware of Robert Augustus Masters work and presence in the Integral world and beyond for some time. Robert had also made some supportive comments on my work in Integral Recovery early on. 

A couple of weeks after the Eneagram workshop I purchased a copy of Spiritual Bypassing and began reading it. OMG! What an amazing read and what profound and absolutely essential wisdom is being brought forward in this volume. I immediately started recommending it to all my students and clients. On a whim I looked up Robert's website and found his telephone number. I called Robert and left a message. A couple of hours later, as I was perusing our local Walmart, Robert called back. Leaning against an island of highly discounted Pepsicola cases, we had our first conversation. And as my friend, David Hollday once said, you can find God in Walmart. He's right near the children's tennis shoe section.
We immediately clicked and I suggested that we have this conversation again, soon, and get it out to all of you. Robert readily agreed and a week later we did, and here are the results. I hope you find it as inspiring and helpful as I did. God bless you all and keep up the deep work.

Love, John
June 17, 2012
___________________

Spiritual Bypassing
with Robert Augustus Masters and John Dupuy
6/17/12

To download the dialogue right-click or control-click here, then choose "save file" or "download linked file"

Tuesday, July 17, 2012

Authors at Google: Dr. Deepak Chopra, "Spiritual Solutions"


There is a lot that I do not like about Deepak Chopra's philosophy but, as Ken Wilber used to say, no one is wrong 100% of the time. In his new book, Spiritual Solutions: Answers to Life's Greatest Challenges, Chopra suggests we look for spiritual solutions to life's challenges - that the solution rarely comes from the same level as the problem.

This is part of the publisher's blurb for the book:
In this groundbreaking book, Chopra shows you how to expand your awareness, which is the key to the confusion and conflict we all face. “The secret is that the level of the problem is never the level of the solution,” he writes. By rising to the level of the solution in your own awareness, you can transform obstacles into opportunities. Chopra leads the reader to what he calls “the true self,” where peace, clarity, and wisdom serve as guides in times of crisis. For Chopra, spirituality is primarily about consciousness, not about religious dogma or relying on the conventional notion of God. “There is no greater power for success and personal growth than your own awareness.” With practical insight, Spiritual Solutions provides the tools and strategies to enable you to meet life’s challenges from within and to experience a sense of genuine fulfillment and purpose.

As long as we don't see this approach as the only solution, it's useful advice. If we try to make this the only solution, we will become lost in spiritual bypass - and I suspect that is where this books leads.

However, I know some readers here value Chopra, so I offer the video in the spirit of a truly inclusive perspective.

This video is part of the on-going Authors@Google series.




Authors at Google: Dr. Deepak Chopra, "Spiritual Solutions"
In his latest book, Spiritual Solutions, Dr. Deepak Chopra explains how many of life's challenges can best be addressed from a spiritual perspective. "The secret is that the level of the problem is never the level of the solution," he writes. In this interview at Google, Dr. Chopra talks about how we can expand our awareness to address difficulties in our lives.

Friday, February 18, 2011

Canadian Therapists Worry that Clients Use Eckhart Tolle as a Spiritual Bypass

http://www.gurusfeet.com/files/gurus_gallery_pics/oprah_eckhart.jpg

Douglas Todd, in the Vancouver Sun, writes about something that many people have been concerned about for a long time - the use of spiritual teachers and practices to bypass pain, wounding, and trauma, essentially stuffing it down, smoothing it over, and otherwise ignoring material that must be processed and healed in order to be a psychologically healthy person.

There is a name for this process - it's called Spiritual Bypassing - and by far the best book on the subject was published last year by integral psychotherapist Robert Augustus Masters. [My review is here.]

In this article, Todd looks specifically at the impact of Eckhart Tolle on this phenomenon - with all his "live in the now" teachings (The Power of Now). There is value to these teachings, but most people lack discernment, so they end up engaging in spiritual bypass and thinking they are becoming spiritually enlightened. As a result, it seems they are dropping out of therapy and then eventually suffering a severe rebound in symptoms - in the words of the recovery movement: what we resist persists.

I have had concerns about this with other practices, as well, such as Big Mind, which promises enlightenment experiences in a couple of hours. Even Ken Wilber's 3-2-1 shadow work process can be a way to avoid the real, in-depth, painful shadow work most of us need and used to bypass the serious issues that must be dealt with in a meaningful way.

You can read more of Todd's excellent articles at his The Search column in the Sun.

By Douglas Todd 18 Feb 2011

The Power of Now may be harmful to your psychological health, if you take it too literally.

Canadian psychotherapists say some troubled clients are crashing after reading Eckhart Tolle’s world-famous books, which teach that the secret to ending your suffering is “to live in the now.”

The head of Canada’s Institute of Family Living says her therapists are having clients who have suffered severe sexual abuse stop trying to face their past ordeals after taking the Vancouver spiritual teacher’s online courses, where they’re taught they must “stay in the present.”

Diane Marshall is one of many counsellors reporting that traumatized clients are dropping out of the therapeutic healing process after reading Tolle and concluding they must minimize their pasts, cease planning their futures and “honour and accept the Now.”

When patients treat such doctrines as the unembellished spiritual truth, therapists say they often try to ignore the fear associated with their dreadful upbringings.

As a result, many are thrown into a severe crisis.

Many clients are “using denial and avoidance in the name of ‘living in the now,’” Marshall told me in an interview. Their anxiety and depression then “sneaks up on them and they are slammed into a real setback.”

Instead of trying to ignore their considerable inner pain, Marshall says people who had difficult upbringings need to grieve their losses.

That way “they’re able to claim their life and go forward courageously into the new future.”
Marshall is one of many Canadian therapists who worry that desperate people suffering depression, anxiety and other psychological conditions are vulnerable to being told that spiritual techniques, like “living in the now,” will offer a magic solution.

While generally supporting the value of serious spirituality and membership in religious organizations, most therapists don’t think there are spiritual shortcuts around the hard work of psychological recovery.

In addition, some therapists worry that struggling people are being thrown into intense depression and further self-hatred after failing to live up to the spiritual solutions set forth by Tolle and other guides.

Tolle’s philosophy, influenced by Eastern spirituality, might be more sophisticated than it appears to his followers. And he’s not the only one who has won fame and fortune by offering self-help advice that seems as uncomplicated as child’s play.

Still, tens of millions of people are reading Tolle’s books, such as The Power of Now and A New Earth, and paying for his online courses, which are marketed by Oprah Winfrey. He’s a major global influence.

Many are wholeheartedly adopting Tolle’s teaching that the key to happiness is to get rid of one’s “egoic mind” and stop “creating time,” which the German-born teacher says dangerously places a person in the past or future.

“True salvation is freedom from negativity,” Tolle says, “and above all of past and future as a psychological need.”

Most therapists, however, say that everyone needs to confront their imperfect pasts, and to build a strong, healthy ego.

The latter gives people the self-confidence to deal with challenging situations, face their often-difficult upbringings, recognize their mistakes and make decent choices about their futures.

Rather than dodging the terrible things that may have happened to us by zeroing in exclusively on “the Now,” noted psychologists such as Mark Freeman say “hindsight” is pivotal to insight and healing.

It is not all wrong to try to be “in the now,” to experience what is happening to us as it’s happening, says Freeman, author of Hindsight: The Promises and Perils of Looking Backward.

But hindsight, the psychologist says, is also “a powerful tool for redressing the forgetfulness that so often characterizes the human condition. It’s a vehicle of recollection, where we are called back to ourselves, and it’s a key feature of living the examined life.”

University of B.C. psychologist Marvin Westwood (right) is another who takes seriously the value of understanding our pasts, including through the ancient wisdom of the Sufi poet, Rumi, who said, “The cure for pain is in the pain.”

We shouldn’t deny our pasts; we should grieve what went wrong, Westwood says. He encourages people who have learned to be “numb” about early hurts to face the fact their hearts were once broken.

“Their pain is a blessing,” Westwood says, “because ultimately it helps to bring back feeling, and can lead the way to the restoration of depth and soul.”

Check out more of my pieces about Eckhart Tolle, including a profile cited by The New York Times


Saturday, January 22, 2011

Rabbi Alan Lurie - The Allure of Narcissistic Spirituality

https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgcOVp4PGuXMz-GfqvsdN0Vk9TVDe9w16dgUaZTiwM-OAb0qd1oG7fja3UxhUTBbqcZjwu3WUcOm_a3Xhh8oZZ36SvVNFxCH9oa9vHZra5n1-_zQM82EQz3keE3jhrFpFq4EcPP/s320/narcissus.jpg

Nice article - he works from a different definition of spirituality, but at least he defines his terms. Here is his working definition:
My acting definition is, "The experience of a transformative connection." In other words, spirituality is experienced -- it is not a concept or construct. It transforms us. It changes how we act, think and feel in all environments. And it is a connection -- a profound contact with something and someone outside of our selves.
This is close to one of Ken Wilber's four basic definitions (#4 is the closest):
I suggest that there are at least four widely used definitions of spirituality, each of which contains an important but partial truth, and all of which need to be included in any balanced account: (1) spirituality involves peak experiences or altered states, which can occur at almost any stage and any age; (2) spirituality involves the highest levels in any of the lines; (3) spirituality is a separate developmental line itself; (4) spirituality is an attitude (such as openness, trust, or love) that the self may or may not have at any stage.[20]
Anyway - spiritual narcissism has become an increasingly serious issue in many spiritual communities, including Western Buddhism. We may often see this as spiritual materialism and/or spiritual bypass.

The Allure of Narcissistic Spirituality

By Rabbi Alan Lurie (BIO)
Posted: January 6, 2011

Several months ago, my wife and I attended a prayer service at a synagogue that is well known for its spiritual, and spirited, approach. As we entered, the rabbi was leading a meditation. "Close your eyes and breathe in the peace of Shabbat [the Sabbath]." she said. "And on the out-breathe imagine that you are sending healing love to all beings." We passed a man who appeared to be deep in meditation. His eyes were closed, and through a slightly opened smile he slowly breathed in and out. As we moved to our seats, I accidentally stepped on his toe. He quickly turned toward me; his smile vanished and he angrily hissed, "Hey, watch it, buddy!"

In the irony of a person being angry at a stranger for accidentally interrupting his meditation about universal, unconditional love, this man demonstrated the disturbing, alluring and all-too common phenomenon of "spiritual narcissism."

To understand spiritual narcissism we must first understand the word "spirituality." My acting definition is, "The experience of a transformative connection." In other words, spirituality is experienced -- it is not a concept or construct. It transforms us. It changes how we act, think and feel in all environments. And it is a connection -- a profound contact with something and someone outside of our selves.

All three of these components are needed in order for spirituality to occur, but the most essential is that it be a connection -- between a person and the Divine, or between one person and another. Spiritual practices are designed to facilitate these connections, and begin with the knowledge that we have two selves: an ego-self and a true-Self. The ego-self is built on our strategy for ensuring that we are physically safe, stemming from our interpretation of the experiences of our lives (primarily our childhood) in which we determined what was required in order to survive. The ego-self may need to impress, dominate or control and sees others as either threats or tools. There is nothing inherently wrong with the ego-self; it is a necessary structure put in place so that we can survive in physical reality. But it is not who we really are, and we can not make a spiritual connection from it. Our true-Self, however, which is often referred to as our soul, contains the very purpose that we incarnated, and is in constant connection with Spirit/Consciousness/Creation/God. It sees others as fellow souls with equally needed purposes, and has compassion for the suffering that comes from the ego-self's attachment to things.

Spiritual practices help us to loosen the grip of the ego-self and to connect to the true-Self, so that we can live purposefully, be of service and participate in love. The central Biblical injunction to "Love your neighbor as yourself" is usually interpreted to mean that we must learn to love others, with the assumption that we already love ourselves. Literally translated, though, this line actually reads, "And you will [in the future tense] love your fellow in the same way that you love yourself." In other words, we will love another to the extent and in the way that we love ourselves. If you are harsh with yourself, you will be harsh with others. If you can not forgive yourself, you can not forgive others. In this way, this line is not a commandment, but is a statement of fact. The truth is that most of us do not love ourselves very well, and consequently we hurt others. This is why spiritual practices so often seek to teach us how to love ourselves, so that we can better love others. Real love naturally flows in two directions.

Spiritual practices becomes narcissistic, though, when the ego-self hijacks the process and assumes that it is the object of self love, becoming enamored of looking in the mirror and claiming that its reflection is the true-Self. Then we loose our way, forgetting that the purpose of learning to love ourselves is to become more open, kind and effective in interactions with others, and instead of opening our hearts with humility and compassion, we assume a position of superiority -- exactly what the ego desires for its safety. Spiritual narcissism sees self-love as the end goal. Spirituality to the ego-self is an object of attainment, much like fame, wealth, an expensive car and a sexy body.

Spiritual narcissism creates the pretense of holiness as an ego strategy to mask insecurity, receive approval, or avoid struggle and growth. "I'm a spiritual person" it proclaims proudly. "I travel to alternate realities, see auras, heal chakras, predict the future, talk to spirits, commune with angels, manipulate energies, meditate for three hours a day, harness the powers of the Universe to attract success. ... The truth is that I'm more evolved than you!" Deep spirituality makes us more sensitive to the feeling of others, encouraging an open stance of courage where we can drop our protective shields and accept the vulnerability to be seen as we are. Narcissistic sensitivity, however, is focused solely on the subtle nuances one's own internality, and resists looking at hard, uncomfortable truths that may upset the self image. One who is narcissistically sensitive is easily offended by the "coarseness" of others, seeks to make his environment change to align with the contours of his needs, and gets angry or offended when this does not happen.

At a seven-day spiritual silent meditation retreat that I recently attended, devoted to nourishing equanimity, attendees routinely wrote messages to the retreat leaders with complaints about others: one attendee complained that two days of progress was "ruined" by another attendee, who sent a note with the words "I love you," and another complained about someone who was walking too loudly on the leaves outdoors. And the leaders publicly scolded an individual who broke the rules by reading a book in public (in Jewish tradition, embarrassing someone in public is considered a very destructive and violent act, and is strictly forbidden). While complaining about others and shaming a rule-breaker at an event intended to teach equanimity is -- like the story in the beginning of this blog -- ironic, it teaches an important warning: The desire to control others in order to create a "perfect" environment that nurtures our sensitivities is a calling card of spiritual narcissism. It is not a spiritual feat to feel equanimity only when everything is going exactly as one would like. True spirituality takes place in the holy messiness of the world, in open-hearted relationship with others, and in a kind smile to one who accidentally stepped on your foot. In that moment of connection, one can clearly see that the annoyances and upsets are actually wake up calls pulling us out of our self-involvement and in to relationship.

The holiest prayer in the Jewish prayer book is the Amidah -- the "standing" prayer -- in which we are in soul connection to God, so that we can praise our Creator for the beauty and bounty of the world, ask for peace, health and understanding and express gratitude for our lives. What is surprising to many is that most of these prayers are in the plural form; we do not pray alone and for ourselves, but for everyone. In this prayer are words that are, for me, the summation of an antidote to the lure of narcissism: "Purify our hearts to be of service in truth." With this one powerful sentence we yearn to move beyond our ego-selves, and to know our true-Selves so that we can be a blessing to others. This is why Judaism teaches us to focus on acts of kindness: inviting someone to your house for lunch, treating a stranger with kindness and giving money to charity are the highest levels of spirituality.

Spiritual narcissism can be very appealing. I know because I also feel the tug, and too often succumb. But once we see how we are tempted to use the guise of spirituality to shield us from criticism, impress others and make us feel wise, its appeal begins to loosen, and we even find the humor in this upside-down dynamic. Then, we slowly see this as an all-too-human inclination, and as we forgive it in ourselves we can forgive it in others, knowing that we are fellow suffering, struggling, holy beings. As Martin Buber, author of I and Thou wrote, "When two people relate to each other authentically and humanly, God is the electricity that surges between them."

Thursday, October 28, 2010

Robert Augustus Masters Speaks with Ken Wilber on Spiritual Bypassing

Robert Augustus Masters new book, Spiritual Bypassing (see my review), is destined to become a touchstone for spiritual practice just as has Chogyam Trungpa's Spiritual Materialism - it's that important. In this talk from Integral Life, Robert and Ken Wilber talk about how we define spiritual bypassing.

This is the first of three talks, the next two require IL membership (free for the first month).

When Spirituality Disconnects Us From What Really Matters











Spiritual Bypassing
Robert Augustus Masters and Ken Wilber

Have you ever:

  • Used spirituality as a sort of escape from reality, or as a way to avoid some painful aspect of your life?
  • Let yourself get taken advantage of or walked all over in the name of blind compassion?
  • Allowed your understanding of ultimate reality to help you avoid or push away your anger, believing such negative emotions to be "lower" or "less spiritual" than your enlightened ideals?
  • Used spiritual (or integral) terminology to relabel your own shadows, using spiritual ideas to pave over the potholes in your own personality?

If you are being completely honest with yourself, odds are you would answer "yes" to one or more of these questions. It might be difficult to admit—in fact, spiritual bypassing is often so subtle and so insidious it can be difficult to even see. But don't worry: you are not alone. In fact, we would be hard pressed to name a single teacher or practitioner who hasn't fallen into similar traps at one time or another. Fortunately, we have people like Robert Augustus Masters and Ken Wilber to help us recognize, confront, and embrace these flickering shadows of spiritual development—offering us a path from from self-deception to self-liberation, from idiot compassion to enlightened action, from effete escapism to the moment-to-moment enactment of infinite and boundless love.

[+listen]

Part 1: What Is Spiritual Bypassing? (Free!)

Right click to download mp3

Right click to download m4b AudioBook

Duration: 20 minutes


Wednesday, September 29, 2010

Exposing Rhonda Byrne's Pseudoscience Nonsense

Entertaining . . . I love a good take-down.

Fight ‘The Power’

Published: September 24, 2010

Here is a lengthy section from the review, with all the relevant points you will need to dismiss this crap.

The law of attraction states that whatever you experience in life is a direct result of your thoughts. It really is that simple. If you think about being fat, you will get fatter. If you think about thin people, you will become thin yourself. If you think about your bills, you will get more bills, but if you think about checks instead, your mailbox will overflow with them. According to “The Secret” and “The Power,” your thoughts and feelings have magnetic properties and “frequencies.” They “vibrate” and resonate with the “universe,” somehow attracting events that share those frequencies back to their thinker.

“The Secret” and “The Power” deliver their wisdom in an ex cathedra voice reminiscent of the “Saturday Night Live” segment “Deep Thoughts.” And Byrne offers no scientific evidence for the absurd physics behind the law of attraction. But that doesn’t mean her books don’t take advantage of up-to-the-minute science. The problem is, it’s not the science she thinks it is.

The law of attraction has been around for millenniums; Byrne cites Plato, Galileo, Beethoven, Edison, Carnegie, Einstein and even Jesus himself as adepts. Just in the past century, it has been repeatedly expressed in essentially the same form as Byrne’s version by Wallace Wattles (“The Science of Getting Rich”), Napoleon Hill (“Think and Grow Rich”) and many other writers. Byrne’s idea of “the universe” plays the same role as Wattles’s “intelligent substance” or Hill’s “infinite intelligence” — a godlike agent that provides whatever we desire. Why is this particular pseudoscientific concept so persistent?

The message of “The Power” and “The Secret” might best be understood as an advanced meme — a sort of intellectual virus — whose structure has evolved throughout history to optimally exploit a suite of weaknesses in the design of the human mind. Had Byrne and the other purveyors of “The Secret” (including Oprah Winfrey, who repeatedly plugged it on her show) set out to reap huge profits by manipulating cognitive biases wired into the brain, they could hardly have done a better job. More likely, they caught the virus themselves and are unwittingly spreading it as far as they can.

The first trick they use is what psychologists call “social proof.” People like to do things other people are doing because it seems to prove the value of their own actions. That is why QVC displays a running count of how many viewers have bought each item for sale, and why advice seems more credible if it appears to come from many different people rather than one. “The Secret” is peppered with quotations from a group of about 20 “teachers” or “avatars,” many of whom are themselves popular self-help gurus. In “The Power,” Byrne also quotes sages like Thoreau, Gandhi and St. Augustine. This ploy, an example of a related logical fallacy called the argument from authority, taps our intuitive beliefs so forcefully that we psychology professors spend time training our introductory students to actively resist it.

Byrne also activates what might be called the illusion of potential, our readiness to believe that we have a vast reservoir of untapped abilities just waiting to be released. This illusion helps explain the popularity of products like “Baby Mozart” and video games that “train your brain” and entertain you at the same time. Unfortunately, rigorous empirical studies have repeatedly shown that none of these things bring about any meaningful improvement in intelligence.

“The Power” and “The Secret” are larded with references to magnets, energy and quantum mechanics. This last is a dead giveaway: whenever you hear someone appeal to impenetrable physics to explain the workings of the mind, run away — we already have disciplines called “psychology” and “neuroscience” to deal with those questions. Byrne’s onslaught of pseudoscientific jargon serves mostly to establish an “illusion of knowledge,” as social scientists call our tendency to believe we understand something much better than we really do. In one clever experiment by the psychologist Rebecca Lawson, people who claimed to have a good understanding of how bicycles work (and who ride them every day) proved unable to draw the chain and pedals in the correct location.

Read the whole article.

Friday, September 17, 2010

My Review: Robert Augustus Masters - Spiritual Bypassing: When Spirituality Disconnects Us from What Really Matters

[Note: I bought this book - I did not receive a review copy.]


I have been reading and enjoying Robert Augustus Masters' newest book, Spiritual Bypassing: When Spirituality Disconnects Us from What Really Matters. I'm reading a Kindle version on my iTouch, so I find myself highlighting whole pages that I want to share.

I can't post the whole book here. Yet I cannot recommend this book strongly enough - if you want to be fully integrated as a human being, get the most from your spiritual practice, and/or go deeper in your psychotherapy, you MUST get this book and read it, slowly and let it sink in.

Of all the people who talk about an integral spirituality and psychology, Masters is the only one I really see walking the talk. His books are not filled with abstract theory, they are practical guides to becoming more authentic, more integrated, and more whole.

Masters gives us an overview of the many varied ways we engage in spiritual bypassing in the first 7 chapters. When we get to chapter 8, "What Generates Spiritual Bypassing?", the answer he gives is perfectly obvious - pain - and yet all the ways we seek to escape the pain generally just make it worse. We seldom look into our pain and seek to heal it - we often try to bypass it and spirituality is often a great way - in our minds - to do it.

This is an excerpt from Spiritual Bypassing. In my opinion, this book will become as important as Chogyam Trungpa's Cutting Through Spiritual Materialism, which they publisher mentions as well.

Here is a blurb from the Amazon site:
Spiritual bypassing—the use of spiritual beliefs to avoid dealing with painful feelings, unresolved wounds, and developmental needs—is so pervasive that it goes largely unnoticed. The spiritual ideals of any tradition, whether Christian commandments or Buddhist precepts, can provide easy justification for practitioners to duck uncomfortable feelings in favor of more seemingly enlightened activity. When split off from fundamental psychological needs, such actions often do much more harm than good.

While other authors have touched on the subject, this is the first book fully devoted to spiritual bypassing. In the lineage of Chögyam Trungpa’s landmark Cutting Through Spiritual Materialism, Spiritual Bypassing provides an in-depth look at the unresolved or ignored psychological issues often masked as spirituality, including self-judgment, excessive niceness, and emotional dissociation. A longtime psychotherapist with an engaging writing style, Masters furthers the body of psychological insight into how we use (and abuse) religion in often unconscious ways. This book will hold particular appeal for those who grew up with an unstructured new-age spirituality now looking for a more mature spiritual practice, and for anyone seeking increased self-awareness and a more robust relationship with themselves and others.

Robert Augustus Masters, PhD, is the author of eleven books, including Transformation Through Intimacy and Darkness Shining Wild. He holds a doctorate in psychology and is a master integral psychotherapist, trainer of psychotherapists, and group leader. He lives in White Rock, British Columbia.
This excerpt is on boundaries:
SPIRITUAL BYPASSING: WHEN SPIRITUALITY DISCONNECTS US FROM WHAT REALLY MATTERS

Here is part of the chapter on boundaries:

...If we are inclined to be overboundaried—overbudgeting for defense—we wall ourselves in, confusing security with freedom. On the other hand, if we tend to be underboundaried—leaving the gates too open—we float on the periphery of embodied life, confusing fusion with intimacy, limitlessness with freedom, and excessive tolerance with compassion. Boundaries make containment possible, but does such containment protect or overprotect us, entrap or serve us, ground or cement us, house or jail us?

Those who are underboundaried tend to mistake collapsed boundaries for expanded ones; especially in the realm of spiritual bypassing, a collapsing (or outright dissolution) of boundaries is seen as letting go or even transcending them. A similar mistake is made in our idealized view of romance, where the overwhelming urge to merge is seen as the ultimate state of love rather than as a temporary fantastical state that inevitably unravels over time. We may rationalize or glamorize this abandonment of boundaries as a kind of liberation, a casting-off of shackles in the service of transcendence and spiritual realization. As much as we might conceive of such radical expansion as a wonderful thing, confusing our flight from boundedness with true openness, we don’t realize that the actual practice of spiritual bypassing does not expand boundaries, but rather neglects and disrespects them. For example, someone we are close to speaks very disrespectfully to us, clearly crossing a line, and instead of asserting ourselves with them, taking a needed stand, we leave their behavior unaddressed and unchallenged, thinking we are being compassionate with them, thereby disrespecting the very boundary of ours that was inappropriately crossed.

Abandoning our boundaries is not indicative of a higher or more noble state—however much we might spiritually rationalize this—but is just escapism and aversion, an avoidance of facing, entering, and moving through our pain. Dissociation in spiritual robes is still dissociation! We may make a virtue out of moving beyond the personal, perhaps thinking that we are transcending it, when in fact we are slipping into the domain of depersonalization (a well-known psychiatric disorder featuring disconnection from one’s sense of self). But depersonalization is not the same as the self-transcending or “no-self ” realizations of advanced spiritual practice! It is just another form of dissociation (or unhealthy separation).

And what is arguably the opposite of dissociation? Intimacy. And intimacy requires healthy boundaries. Healthy boundaries protect but do not overprotect; they stand guard but do not jail. If we keep ourselves overprotected, we don’t thrive but stagnate. And if we keep ourselves underprotected, we also don’t thrive but open ourselves undiscerningly, left in a state in which overabsorption is inevitable. The spiritual bypasser in us might protest: shouldn’t we be receptive? Yes, but overabsorption and receptivity are not necessarily the same thing! Consider the example of a man who is exaggeratedly nice and almost always smiling, even when he is treated badly. He may appear very receptive and unusually open, but in fact he is taking in much more than is healthy for him, perhaps because this strategy—never saying a clear “no”—helped him survive difficulties in his early years.

Having healthy boundaries doesn’t mean a lack of receptivity; instead, it is a discerning receptivity, an openness that can just as easily say a full-blooded “no” as a “yes”. The undiscriminating openness and too easy “yes” (and possible show of equanimity) of those who are underboundaried is especially difficult to cut through when it’s taken to be a sign of spiritual attainment. When we cannot voice and embody an unequivocal “no,” allowing ourselves to be closed at times, our only way of protecting ourselves is to dissociate, to get away from what’s difficult rather than face and pass through it. Where being overboundaried appears to promise freedom through security, being underboundaried seems to promise freedom through limitlessness. But both cut us off from living fully. This fact is usually obvious when we overprotect ourselves but not necessarily when we underprotect ourselves, especially when we legitimize our actions spiritually, making an unquestioned virtue out of our undiscriminating openness...
I could offer lots of other quotes, especially from the chapters on shadow work (hint: 1-2-3 shadow work ain't real shadow work), blind compassion, false transcendence, magical thinking, sex, shame, and so much more.

This book is so clear and so true that one wonders how no one else has ever written this.
Instead of trying to get beyond our personal history, we need to learn to relate to it with as much clarity and compassion as possible, so that it serves rather than obstructs our healing and awakening. This also means relating in similar fashion to our tendency to spiritually bypass, casting a lucid, caring eye upon the part of us who buys into us. (Location 225)

* * *

When we remain outside or removed from our fear, we are trapped by it, but when we actually do get inside, cultivating intimacy with it, we are no longer trapped by it, discovering--and not just intellectually--that it is but darkly contracted energy, a knotted-up vitality that can be freed when we become intimate with it. (Location 337)

* * *

Real shadow work does not leave us intact; it is not some neat and tidy process but rather an inherently messy one, as vital and unpredictably alive as birth. The ass it kicks is the one upon which you are sitting; the pain it brings up is the pain we've been fleeing most of our life; the psychoemotional breakdowns it catalyzes are the precursors to hugely relevant breakthroughs; the doors it opens are doors that have shown up year after year in our dreams, awaiting our entry. Real shadow work not only breaks us down but also breaks us open, turning frozen yesterday into fluid now. (Location 635)
Those are from the first few chapters - there are wise quotes like these on nearly every page.