Thursday, September 14, 2006

Starving Artist Syndrome


This was the Daily Om from a couple of days ago:
Learn And Let Flow
We Don't Need To Suffer

The idea that we have to suffer or live in poverty in order to be spiritual is an old one and can be found in the belief systems of many philosophies. Most of us carry this idea around subconsciously, and we may be holding ourselves back from financial or emotional well-being, believing that this is what we must do in order to be virtuous, spiritually awake, or feel less guilty for the suffering of others.

While it's true that there can be a spiritual purpose to experiencing a lack of material well-being, it is rarely intended to be a permanent or lifelong experience. What we are meant to find when material or emotional resources are in short supply is that there is more to our lives than the physical realm. Intense relationships and material abundance can distract us from the subtler realm of the spirit, so a time of deficiency can be spiritually awakening. However, once we recognize the realm of spirit, and remember to hold it at the center of our lives, there is no reason to dwell in poverty or emotional isolation. In fact, once our connection to spirit is fully intact, we feel so compelled to share our abundance that lack becomes a thing of the past.

If you find that you are experiencing suffering in some area of your physical life, perhaps your spirit is asking you to look deeper in your search for what you want. For example, if you want money so that you can experience the feeling of security but money keeps eluding you, your spirit may be asking you to understand that security is not to be found through money. Security comes from an unshakable connection to your soul. Once you make that connection, money will probably flow more easily into your life. If relationships elude you, your spirit may be calling you to recognize that the love you seek is not to be found in another person. And yet, ironically, once you find the love, your true love may very well appear. If you feel stuck in suffering to live a spiritual life, try to spend some time writing about it. The root of the problem will appear and it may not be what you expected. Remember, the Universe wants you to be happy.

When I was struggling with issues around money a few years ago, someone told me that the issue was holding onto money too tightly -- in a figurative sense. He wasn't Buddhist, but he was talking about clinging and attachment.

I had poverty mentality, a sense that I wasn't getting enough of anything: money, "things," security, or whatever. The stupid thing is that I had spent several years of my life right out of college cultivating this "starving artist" mentality.

I thought that to be a good poet, I had to be living close to the edge. It wasn't enough that I was drinking and smoking myself to an early grave, or living in an emotionally abusive relationship. I had to be financially on edge as well, so I worked in a low wage, romantic job -- a bookstore. And yep, I was poor.

When things finally shifted for me, it was because I re-aligned my life with sufficiency and purpose, and not with struggle and need. I'm not rich, but I am open to that possibility.

Most of the struggles we face, as the article notes, are lessons for our souls -- if we are willing to relate to them in that way.


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