Being Truly Thankful

Beyond Counting Blessings
Being Truly Thankful

by Madisyn Taylor

Our gratitude deepens when we begin to be thankful for being alive during this time and living the life we are living.

Often when we practice being thankful, we go through the process of counting our blessings, acknowledging the wonderful people, things and places that make up our reality. While it is fine to be grateful for the good fortune we have accumulated, true thankfulness stems from a powerful comprehension of the gift of simply being alive, and when we feel it, we feel it regardless of our circumstances. In this deep state of gratitude, we recognize the purity of the experience of being, in and of itself, and our thankfulness is part and parcel of our awareness that we are one with this great mystery that is life.
It is difficult for most of us to access this level of consciousness as we are very caught up in the ups and downs of our individual experiences in the world. The thing to remember about the world, though, is that it ebbs and flows, expands and contracts, gives and takes, and is by its very nature somewhat unreliable. If we only feel gratitude when it serves our desires, this is not true thankfulness. No one is exempt from the twists and turns of fate, which may, at any time, take the possessions, situations, and people we love away from us. Ironically, it is sometimes this kind of loss that awakens us to a thankfulness that goes deeper than just being grateful when things go our way. Illness and near-miss accidents can also serve as wake-up calls to the deeper realization that we are truly lucky to be alive.
We do not have to wait to be shaken to experience this state of being truly thankful for our lives. Tuning in to our breath and making an effort to be fully present for a set period of time each day can do wonders for our ability to connect with true gratitude. We can also awaken ourselves with the intention to be more aware of the unconditional generosity of the life force that flows through us regardless of our circumstances.

Ed and Deb Shapiro - What Are You Grateful For?

Contrary to what I have been hearing in the media, at the gym, or among my clients, today is NOT turkey day . . . it's Thanksgiving. It's NOT a day to get together with our friends and families and drink too much, revive ancient wounds, and eat until we fall into a carbohydrate induced coma . . . it's a day to share our gratitude and thankfulness for friends, family (if one is grateful for them), and all the good things in our lives. It's a day when the glass is always half full, when we count our blessings, and when we try to see the best in other people.

Obviously, for many people in this country, there is little to be grateful for - homes have been lost, unemployment is still exceptionally high even as corporations bring in record profits, there is illness and disease and war and violence and addictions and any other kind of suffering one can imagine. And yet, we are alive . . . until they put me in the ground and roll my box into the furnace, I hold on to the hope that things will be better tomorrow, or tomorrow, or tomorrow. And even if we have nothing, tomorrow things may change . . . and while work toward that better day, we can be grateful for those who help us along the way, for strangers who smile as they pass, for anything that touches our hearts.

What Are You Grateful For?

Ed and Deb Shapiro  - Authors, 'Be The Change'; Hosts, 'Going Out of Your Mind' radio; Meditation teachers; Bloggers, Oprah.com

Posted: 11/20/2012
This is the time of year when gratitude touches all our lives, when we give thanks for whatever we have and we joyfully help others. One Thanksgiving Day we volunteered at a local church to help feed the homeless. It was and still is one of the most heartwarming things we have done, as they were so very thankful: older people, single people, couples, families. It was a gentle reminder to us to be grateful for what we have.

It's not always easy to be thankful, especially when times are hard, if we are sick, or we have lost a partner, job, or home. But perhaps those are the very best times to give thanks -- for the things we do have, rather than those things we don't have. Rather than bemoaning that we have lost our health we can be grateful for the birds singing outside or the sun warming the window. Rather than being jealous of someone who has a job while we don't, we can be grateful for the free time to spend with ourselves or a loved one.

Deb grew up in England, so she didn't encounter Thanksgiving until she moved to the U.S. in her 20s. Not knowing its history, she just saw it as a wonderful opportunity to remember appreciation and gratitude for all the things that she normally took for granted. 

For instance, take a moment right now to appreciate the chair you are sitting on as you read this. Just consider what went into the making of this chair: the wood, cotton, wool or other fibers, the trees and plants that were made into these materials, the earth that grew the trees, the rain and sun, the animals that were involved, the people who prepared the materials, the factory where the chair was made, the designer and carpenter and seamstress, the shop where you bought it -- all this just so you could be sitting here now. 

Or think of your body and all the different organs and functions and systems that sustain your life, such as your heart, your digestion, or your immune system that protects you from illness. Or the food that nourishes you and where it came from and all the people and plants and weather and transport that were needed to get that food on your table. 

You can apply this to everything, as nothing is unrelated or disconnected. Every single thing is a part of everything else and all are needed to make a whole. It's so huge, there is no beginning place. There is just an endless stream of connectedness that has come together to enable you to be here right now, in this moment, reading this, sitting on your chair. And you still don't think you have anything to feel grateful for or worth appreciating? 

We invite you to develop an ongoing relationship with gratitude by making a list of things to "remember to appreciate." You can do this hourly, daily, weekly, finding different things to appreciate each time. Anything can go on that list: each other, toenails, trees, sunshine, the washing machine, walking, hot water, grapefruit, flannel sheets...

What's on your list? As Thanksgiving is here, let us all try to take some time to say thank you for all those things we usually ignore. Then say "Thank you!" again. Say it out loud over and over. We can never have enough gratitude; let it fill every moment, every thought and every feeling. Experiencing gratitude is totally transforming. 

Let us also discover what we can do to make someone else's life a little easier, or even to ask for help we may need. As our friend Barbara Wilder, author of Money Is Love, says:

"No matter how little you have, there is always someone who has less. Give whatever you can to someone who could use a little help, and be open to receiving help from others."

What are you grateful for? Do comment below. You can receive notice of our blogs every Tuesday by checking Become a Fan at the top. 

For more by Ed and Deb Shapiro, click here.
For more on emotional wellness, click here.

Rick Hanson, Ph.D. - Say Thanks!

The world is going to hell in more ways than I can count, and there is so much to be grateful for - Happy Thanksgiving!

Rick Hanson, Ph.D. - Say Thanks!

Each Thanksgiving holiday, we are reminded to be thankful. When times are tough, finding reasons to be thankful may be challenging or even seem inappropriate or impossible. This year, before we sit around the dinner table, let’s think about the myriad benefits to saying thanks, and how to truly savor the opportunity, no matter what.

* * *

What do others give you?
The Practice:
Say thanks.
Why?

What do you feel when someone thanks you for something? For a comment in a meeting, a task done at home, an extra step taken, an encouraging word.

You probably feel seen, appreciated, that you matter to the other person. Maybe a little startled, maybe wondering if you really deserve it, but also glad. Personally, this is how it is for me.

Turning it around, when you say “thank you” to someone, it’s a small moment with big ripples: a confirmation of a deep and wonderful truth, that we all depend on each other, that we are all joined – across dinner tables and across the world – in a web whose threads are innumerable acts of giving.

For example, often when I eat a meal I’ll take a moment to imagine the details of how that tomato or rice was grown and then transported onto my plate, including the people who walked the fields to plant and eventually pick it, and the man or woman who drove the truck that carried it to the store where I bought it. Those folks do not know me, but they’re real people, working hard, hoping for a good life, worrying about the people they love, extending themselves in their jobs, giving me something extra, all this woven into the food that’s entering my blood, my bones: thank you.

You can’t possibly say thank you to everything you’re given. No one can. So when you do say thanks, it’s a token of your appreciation for the larger whole, joining you with that whole. It will make you happy to open to the giving coming your way each day.

And in giving thanks to the people in your life, you open the door to receiving their thanks in turn. In your home or company, a nice circle, a step toward a culture of gratitude.

How?

For starters, it’s hard to give thanks if you’re uncomfortable acknowledging that you have received something. Perhaps you don’t want to feel indebted, or don’t want to look needy. Maybe it’s simply embarrassing. These feelings are normal – but they can sure get in the way of being thankful.

To deal with them, begin by naming them to yourself: squirmy . . . embarrassed . . . resentful . . . awkward . . . don’t want to owe anyone anything . . . Hold them in a big open space of awareness, like dark clouds in a vast sky. Don’t fight them, but gently move your attention away from them, back to your breathing and to a basic sense of being alright as a body . . . bringing to mind a sense of being cared about by someone . . . recognizing some of your good intentions in life . . . knowing one or more benefits to you of saying thanks . . . knowing what the other person has given you . . . feeling a simple sense of appreciation . . . feeling that it’s alright to be thankful . . . making it OK in your mind to express thanks.

And then be straightforward and simple, and say “Thank you” in whatever way is natural.

Many thank you’s involve little things in the flow of life, like thanking someone for passing the salt at dinner. Let these small moments matter to you. Feel your thanks in your chest and throat. When you say your thanks, try to let them show in your eyes. Life is made up of moments, beads on a golden chain; what are you stringing together? As they say in Tibet: “If you take care of the minutes, the years will take care of themselves.”

Also consider where you might have a backlog of thanks, perhaps for some big things. Like saying thanks to your parents or other relatives, to old friends and new ones, to teachers and coaches of all kinds. Thanks to lovers and mates, children, pets, neighbors – even people you’ve never met, even the whole natural world. A wonderful and powerful practice is to make a list of people you want to thank directly, and then gradually move through the list. You can also certainly offer thanks in your imagination, such as to people who are no longer living, to people far away, to groups of people, to specific animals or to nature in general, or to spiritual beings or forces if that is meaningful to you.

Throughout, it is very sweet to be thankful for the opportunity to give thanks.

* * *

Rick Hanson, Ph.D., is a neuropsychologist and author of the bestselling Buddha’s Brain: The Practical Neuroscience of Happiness, Love, and Wisdom (in 21 languages) – and Just One Thing: Developing a Buddha Brain One Simple Practice at a Time. Founder of the Wellspring Institute for Neuroscience and Contemplative Wisdom and Affiliate of the Greater Good Science Center at UC Berkeley, he’s taught at Oxford, Stanford, and Harvard, and in meditation centers worldwide. His work has been featured on the BBC, NPR, Consumer Reports Health, and U.S. News and World Report and he has several audio programs. His blog – Just One Thing – has nearly 30,000 subscribers and suggests a simple practice each week that will bring you more joy, more fulfilling relationships, and more peace of mind and heart. If you wish, you can subscribe to Just One Thing here.

Daily Om - Being Truly Thankful: Beyond Counting Blessings

Being Truly Thankful: Beyond Counting Blessings

When we are in the state of thankfulness, we are in a higher state of awareness, gratitude at our doorstep.
Often when we practice being thankful, we go through the process of counting our blessings, acknowledging the wonderful people, things and places that make up our reality. While it is fine to be grateful for the good fortune we have accumulated, true thankfulness stems from a powerful comprehension of the gift of simply being alive, and when we feel it, we feel it regardless of our circumstances. In this deep state of gratitude, we recognize the purity of the experience of being, in and of itself, and our thankfulness is part and parcel of our awareness that we are one with this great mystery that is life.

It is difficult for most of us to access this level of consciousness as we are very caught up in the ups and downs of our individual experiences in the world. The thing to remember about the world, though, is that it ebbs and flows, expands and contracts, gives and takes, and is by its very nature somewhat unreliable. If we only feel gratitude when it serves our desires, this is not true thankfulness. No one is exempt from the twists and turns of fate, which may, at any time, take the possessions, situations, and people we love away from us. Ironically, it is sometimes this kind of loss that awakens us to a thankfulness that goes deeper than just being grateful when things go our way. Illness and near-miss accidents can also serve as wake-up calls to the deeper realization that we are truly lucky to be alive.

We do not have to wait to be shaken to experience this state of being truly thankful for our lives. Tuning in to our breath and making an effort to be fully present for a set period of time each day can do wonders for our ability to connect with true gratitude. We can also awaken ourselves with the intention to be more aware of the unconditional generosity of the life force that flows through us regardless of our circumstances.

Tags: gratitude, life, thankful, Daily Om, Being Truly Thankful, Beyond Counting Blessings, Thanksgiving