Satire: Rex Grossman Purposely Doesn't Tell Family, Friends He's In Super Bowl

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From The Onion:

MIAMI—Chicago Bears quarterback Rex Grossman informed his teammates yesterday that he isn't going to tell his family and friends he's playing in Super Bowl XLI. "If I tell them, I know they'll watch, and that's just added pressure I don't need," said Grossman, adding that the last time he informed his parents he was playing in a football game, he threw three interceptions and posted a quarterback rating of 1.3 against the Minnesota Vikings. "If I do well, I can always send them a tape." Upon hearing that Grossman would not be using his standard allotment of tickets, Colts quarterback Peyton Manning reportedly inquired about purchasing them, saying he only needed five more to accommodate all of his 435 friends and family members.

Tags: Rex Grossman, Chicago Bears, The Onion, Peyton Manning, Super Bowl